10 Things I Confess I Do Not Understand
1. Women who wear those sweat pants with the word JUICY emblazoned across the rear end. Really?!?
2. Pringles Potato Chips, all flavors.
It's like the IKEA furniture design team got a hold of some bad weed, smoked it, then poured open a box of dried potato flakes, a box of Morton's salt, tap water and mucked around in a test kitchen for 24 hours.
3. Garden gnomes
What are they in your yard for? Hidden camera surveillance? They just look like they're going to come alive and start peeping in your bathroom window.
4. Obesity statistics.
Is everyone fat now, or did they also change the criteria for what constitutes obese?
5. Those erectile dysfunction television commercials.
All of them make me NOT want to have sex with any guy over 30. Between the plaintive "When the moment is right" refrain and the threat of lasting all weekend long. What??!! It makes you think you're going to be an earthquake victim somewhere trapped under a jackhammer that's screaming "Is it good? Is it good?"
6. Nipple piercings. Enough said.
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| Chimp Love Shirt. Next time, just get the shirt. Forget about the chimp. |
8. White couches. Where do you sit? Does everyone get to sit there or just certain people? Are the owners the same people who make you take your shoes off at the door? Should we wear togas?
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| Cat Antoinette at Etsy |
10. Speedos. Please. Just stop the madness before I go blind.
Good night,
Wanda
Copyright Wanda Fleming, 2011
5 comments:
LOL hard...Ah yes Wanda....I confess I am guilty as charged with the Halloween one. I dress up every year. Although I drink the kiddie punch and diet soda for adults..n liquor. I don't like the candy much never do the kids ok maybe those little kit kats :)(we still have candy left over from last Halloween) I guess I should finally toss it? But we like collecting it which is always loads of fun. Kids dont take me with them anymore I hand out the treats at home. Juicy pants no comment....although is seemed like every young women on UVa"s campus had them on when I was last there....speedos..hmmmm speechless..hated them in the eighties....still hate them.
A teacher at the children's school once had those sweats on...Given the choice, I'd take salty over sweet..potato chips over candy...Lily says there were two men in Speedos at the Wilson pool yesterday--uh oh--some gentlemen did not get the memo!! :-)
Lol about the teacher's dress...that would be a fun blog to write about......first day of school last year a teacher wore a low halter,mini skirt and flip flop looking shoes....the fourth grade boys went crazy....I was not amused and glad that she was not my sons teacher....no she was not petit...quite the opposite...sorry I guess I am old school..just couldn't take her serious..
Hilarious! Are you publishing these anywhere else? HubPages, for instance. There's so much supposed-to-be-funny stuff out there. It's a delight to read funny stuff that actually is. Funny, that is. Cheers, Marian
Carla LOL@ "the fourth grade boys went crazy..." Hahhahha... Oh my....
Marian. Thanks for the compliment. It's very sweet. I think I try not to be a smart ass but alas I have a bit of that in my nature and sometimes it comes seeping out lol .... ;-)
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